‘Love’ is an arbitrary thing that is difficult to make sense of. It’s a dead word, used in so many ways and so many times, that at a certain juncture we say it, and we know what it means, but we cannot define it.
The question is, why is love so difficult to define?
It’s because when we think of love, we think only of the love we’ve experienced and the ‘love’ we’re capable of giving, and it’s all we know. It’s entirely individual; it’s completely incomparable. But it’s ours, and that’s why we care about it so deeply.
Love to me, means forever. The kind of forever that’s filled with the kind of past forevers that have already been there; road trips where we ate so much junk food we felt bloated and lulled into listless silence on the road while listening to The Beatles in the blazing summer sunshine; more kisses goodbye in airports and on front porches that were sad but still amazing; more all-encompassing hugs that feel like an enveloping blanket on an early October evening when the sun goes down early but you can still withstand sitting outside on a back porch soaking in the autumn air; more morning snuggling when nobody feels like getting up, even if brunch is an option before 2 pm; more engaging talks about being a teacher which make me want to be even better and do even more; more enriching revisits of the past that helps to gain a better understanding of the opposite person; more plays, movies, dinner dates, and afternoons when we just sit on the couch with our legs entangled watching TV.
Love is meeting a complete stranger in a fateful place – fateful for careers and life and the converging of two souls in similar situations who came together because of circumstance, aligning stars, and a little spangling of destiny.
I vow to love this way forever, no matter what happens, no matter where we are in terms of geography and emotional isolation or in the happiest of happy moments, like this one. I vow to be a part of life and love and remain ever-present and ever-committed, opening my eyes with clarity and promise and focus, for the rest of our lives. I vow it because I feel it, because I know love and its power and I don’t need to define that or answer it any other way than I just did. This is love to me, and I’m in it.