They say “living well is the best revenge”. Who says that? People who want revenge but they don’t actually want to undertake acts of vengeance. They live their lives in such a way that they do everything, as if they’re panning for gold; they dig and dig and dig, and they come across teensy weensy nuggets, precious metals, found among the gravel in the river. Those are revenge, if you are living your life this way.
I know a friend who exacted revenge without realizing it; she and her boyfriend had sex in the person’s house with whom she later had a falling out with. This was pre-revenge because my friend received what she felt were patronizing, condemning instructions to not have sex, and she did it because she didn’t want to be infantalized by someone else’s parents. After the falling-out, she appreciated this lapse in judgment not as a lapse but more as vengeance.
This weekend, I did Tough Mudder, and it was pretty terrifying. I had to pretend to be fearless even though I’m not really fearless at all (at least in mot realms of my life). I climbed up 30 ft. ladders and jumped off a makeshift cliff about 20 feet high. I got hoisted over really tall walls, I crawled through culverts and under trenches and barbed wire and I got electric shocked and I ran and ran and ran for 19 km. It took hours. Grueling, painful, sun-burnt hours. At the finish line, I received my headband and it felt… good. Really good. Maybe what they say is right, I thought. Maybe living well is the best revenge. It might not feel as good as purposefully trying to make someone feel as badly as they made you feel, and it might not provide any closure, but maybe it is best for everyone.
Maybe people are out there in the world (not just maybe) who have tried their best to find other ways to exact revenge on me. For what? I don’t know. That person is trying to infringe upon past thorns in my side because they probably thought it would make them feel better. Again, for what? I have no idea. Two can play that game. Two might play that game one day. But in this case, two people won’t play that game. One person will play that game in their own little world and they can keep trying to win. The other person will do Tough Mudder. And take comfort in the fact that someone had sex in that person’s house.